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Chronic Pain & Life

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Feeling like you're not good enough? Where does that feeling come from? 

6/29/2016

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Have you ever had feelings of not being good enough? Ever questioned your own self-worth? Ever thought "I could be loved if only I..."? (one thought I used to fill my blank in with was "if only I could be skinny"). Ever thought you just didn't "measure up"? When did it happen and what happened to leave you feeling that way? Do you know? Deep and personal questions I know...but please do give them some thought.

A lot of what we think and feel for ourselves, and even love/hate about ourselves...can actually come from someone else...from an experience in our lives that left us hurting...and it impacts how we think and feel about ourselves even today. But you know what? WE are good enough! We just need to heal the part(s) of us that's hurting.

Today I'd like to share something I found and ask that you give it some thought. As you read this...explore and challenge the thoughts you hold about yourself...where did these thoughts come from? why do you not feel good enough? (and challenge the thoughts you hold) We can't heal what we can't acknowledge. 

Please take a look at the following and really give yourself and the beliefs you hold about yourself...some careful consideration. Challenge your thoughts! Challenge your beliefs! Heal what hurts and allow yourself the love and acceptance you need. We can move forward from this and we can become stronger through it. 

Take good care of you and always remember....YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH! you always have been! you just didn't know it...maybe now you will? 

Tammy 

(we're not done with this topic)​
​When you have a strong feeling of being “never good enough”, it will typically come in 4 different forms:

1. Competence
The feeling that I am “never good enough” at some skill or ability, like making money, being “perfect” or something else I “should” be good at.

2. Body
The feeling that my body is not good enough — I am not thin enough, strong enough, tall enough or pretty enough.

3. Identity
The feeling that I am somehow the “wrong kind” of person — it could be my gender, my race, my age or even my personality (too quiet, too pushy).

4. Relationship
The feeling that “I will be loved only if I am _____.” This “_____” could be based on my outward success (competence), my body appearance (body), my willingness to “change who I am” (identity) or something else - where I feel I will get love, ONLY IF I meet some other condition - just being my own self is not enough.

Why You Have It
If you have some combination of these four, it is usually the result of an inner emotional wound that was suffered in childhood – through no fault of your own.

This self-critical inner voice is typically inherited from one’s parents, and it is transmitted unwittingly and without malice.

However, once the seeds of these wounds are planted, they will lead to feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, and anger, all throughout one’s life.

This will also lead to hardship in one's relationships - both romantic and professional.

How to Heal It
The key to truly healing this wound is not to fight the harsh inner voice, or to forcibly numb it with alcohol, food, or overachievement, but instead to try and rescue it – this forceful inner voice is actually an integral part of you – a part of your deep inner self, which has been cut off from you, and it is wounded and in pain.

It's not trying to hurt you - it actually needs your help.

This is the true meaning of “recovery” – that you must recover this exiled part of you, so that you may become truly whole and healed.

Written by Artie Wu
Preside Meditation
to learn more about this check out Preside Meditation 


Please note: I am not advertising nor promoting this program but am offering this information as something to think about.
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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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