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Chronic Pain & Life

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Reality of fear....

4/26/2016

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Picture
Often what we fear is not the true reality of our fears.

What are your thoughts on that comment? Would you agree? When it comes to your fears...what is the true reality? Have you ever explored your fears to find out? 

During my journey I came face to face with my fears and when I learned to understand them...I learned how to move through them. And even though I'm still scared...I'm doing it anyway.

When I avoided going out...I wasn't afraid of falling, I was afraid of embarrassing myself and having people laugh at me.

I wasn't afraid of love, I was afraid of someone not accepting me (just like I didn't                                                                                                              accept me).                                                                                        

I wasn't afraid of trying, I was afraid of failing (again). And yes I was afraid of hurting for the same reasons (caused by my own actions at times and even my own thoughts too).

I wasn't afraid of the people around me, I was embarrassed of who I was now and I feared answering the question...what do you do for a living? I didn't think I was "enough".

It took me some time, tears and some deep self reflection too...but you know what I found out? I found out I was stronger than my fears. So what if I fell again? What did I do the last time I fell? I picked myself up. And if I fell again? well I'd just pick myself up...again! And I had to remind myself it doesn't matter what other people think...it matters what I think! 

I also realized that if I couldn't accept who I was...how could anyone else? If I didn't love me...how could I accept anyone else loving me? And you know what? I didn't give myself enough credit. I sold myself short. There are many words that have come to be very important to me during my journey and acceptance is one of them. I had to learn to love and accept myself for all that I am (and even for the things I am not anymore). I had to love and accept myself and it was okay if I did...in fact? I needed to love and accept myself.

When I learned how to prepare for and even manage my pain I could face my fear of going out again. I didn't have to hide anymore. I could bring along my coping skills, I could learn how to support myself...I didn't have to fear feeling my pain anymore because I was in control of it. (even if I had to leave because I was hurting...it was my choice and I didn't beat myself up for it...I just did what I needed for me knowing I was loving myself enough)

I'm sharing some of my fears with you as a way of saying it's okay...to have fears, to feel under them...to stop living for you...but now that you know...YOU CAN CHANGE THIS! yes you can! Don't hide from your fears but learn how to explore them and learn how to support yourself through them. Question your thoughts and find the true reality in your fears. 

take good care of you eh? 

Picture found on-line and I can't remember from where--sorry.
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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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