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Chronic Pain & Life

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Surviving and living a life with pain.....

3/16/2016

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Although I don't consider myself "suicidal" anymore...I still have those days when I entertain the thought..."I can't handle this for the rest of my life"...this thought can really get me going down my rabbit hole if I let it. When I do chase it, I'm reminded of the others...the other "reasons" why I could justify ending my own life. We've done a dangerous dance with each other my thoughts and I. 

Although I may still have these thoughts from time to time, they no longer have the appeal they once did. I am able to recognize their signs and I'm able to deal with the emotions these feelings can bring. By having a plan in place to help me deal with this, I have been able to survive the days I once thought I never would or even could.

Our thoughts are powerful but sometimes they're not helpful. This is one of the biggest steps we can take to change things moving forward. Being able to recognize, reject and replace our thoughts with thoughts that are helpful, healing, loving, and caring...it's an important step.
Finding the things in my life that make me feel good to be me and the things that make me smile...well that was a healing blessing. Sometimes when all we feel is the pain of our bodies...we forget our smiles and we can forget the beauty that is still our lives. But you know what? it's still there...waiting for us to acknowledge it and to live it again. 

I think staying focused on what was...robs us of what is. We can't change that we feel pain now...but we can change what we do about it moving forward. It's easy to get stuck in what we were...but we can't go back there...we can only go forward. Accepting that is hard...but it's important. Are you able to love who you are now?...including your pain too? 


Being able to accept pain as a part of me and my life wasn't easy. I didn't want it. I didn't think I could survive it. I thought it would be easy...but it wasn't. It was and still is some days...very hard. But I learned...I learned to love myself more, to care for myself more, and I am stronger than I believe myself to be sometimes. And you know what? so are you! Have you forgotten that? Have you gotten lost? 

On the days you question whether you can do this...tell yourself you can! tell yourself you will! tell yourself the things you need to hear to get you up and going again! do the things you need for you...do the things that help you to heal...do the things you need to help you smile, laugh and enjoy your life...do the things that will challenge you to live beyond your pain...do the things you need for you. Ask for help when you need it and love yourself enough to accept it when it's offered. We all need a little help some days.

​Accepting and loving ourselves is an important key to our healing. Your pain, your illness, is only one part of who you are and you are so much more than that! Don't forget that okay? You are what makes you smile, you are your dreams, you are the love you give to those in your life...YOU are so much more than your pain. Live in those parts of your life okay? Give them a chance again. 

Not everyone we will meet will understand our journey and that's okay...it's ours...not theirs. But please...don't stop living and healing just because they don't understand. It's not their life...it's yours! and it's up to you how you live it now going forward. How will you help you to heal? What can and what will you do for you now? 


​People ask me..."how do you live that life?" and my answer? "The same way you live yours"...to the best of my abilities. I still laugh, I still love, I still care, and I am still here! still moving forward and my pain won't stop me! 

take good care of you okay? 
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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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