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Chronic Pain & Life

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We're having a party....a pity party!

5/15/2014

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Ever have one of those days where life just seems to be kicking you to the curb? Everything that could wrong in your day has gone wrong and you're left feeling overwhelmed, beaten and raw. Life has a way of chewing us up and spitting us out...at least that's how I've felt some days.

In life there are many mountains to climb and many hurdles to jump and some can find us falling flat on our butts feeling sorry for ourselves. To have feelings of self-pity for all that you have lost and have gone through in life is normal. It's okay to feel sad sometimes. 

If you're finding these feelings become overwhelming or life consuming, please talk with your doctor or health care professional. Please understand too that I am not comparing the pity party days to clinical depression. They are completely different and clinical depression will not likely benefit from a pity party. 
To have a pity party is to release your feelings Use this time to acknowledge the pain and hurt you are feeling, and release the emotions so that you can move forward.  

Pity parties can happen in the moment as they hit you, where you just have find a place to hide and cry for a bit and there may even be times in your life when you just can't fall apart when you need to. Maybe it's because you don't want anyone to see you fall apart, or maybe you're just too busy to acknowledge your feelings. When this happens you can plan a pity party instead. Yep you can! A party just for you.

To plan a pity party....

Pick a date and time...a party is something we can look forward to and like all good parties...they do come to an end.

Pick a place to party...the best pity parties are usually held in your room, in your comfie clothes and plumped up by the pillows or maybe your spot is on the floor with your legs crossed and your arms hugging yourself...have your party where ever you feel relaxed and comforted...a tub filled with bubbles is one of my favourite spots and I've even had a party in a tub of cookie dough ice cream....pity parties can happen anywhere you like.

Invite your guests...now pity parties are ones best had alone as misery doesn't always love company...but you can invite your pets, stuffed animals if you have them and anything else that is silently supportive and will not pass judgement on you.

Have good snacks!...every good party has snacks and treats...whether you get lost in a bowl of cookie dough ice cream or a bag cheesies...allow yourself some comfort food...the "diet" can wait for a day.

Surround yourself with the things that make you feel sad...whether it's a picture of an ex love, heart tugging love songs, or old love letters...the purpose of a pity party is to let go of all the hurt inside...so surround yourself with what makes you sad and will keep the tears coming.

When the crying is done and the guests have gone home, pick yourself up and know that tomorrow is another chance to try again. Life will kick us in the pants sometimes but it can also give us some incredibly amazing memories and opportunities. Give those moments of your life thought too okay? Often we don't see the forest through the trees when we're swamped in the negativity. 

A good pity party can be a productive part of healing and accepting the negative that life can bring. However, if you're sitting around feeling sorry for yourself all the time though, it really isn't serving any purpose in your life. That will only keep you static and going no-where fast if you think about it. Plan a party instead and let go of the negative feelings and emotions that you are holding on to. It's a feel good thing really and once you've let them go, those moments of your life will have less power over you.

Try not to take life too seriously okay? None us will make it out of life alive. 
take good care of you 
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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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