Yesterday, my daughter and I took off to Grand Bend, ON to see the beach. (Yeah she's a waterbaby too.) My daughter had some high hopes for our day and was really looking forward to laying her butt in the sand and even going for a swim in the water...however...it was a red flag kind of day and the wind and waves had other plans.
She was disappointed to say the least and she complained! a lot! And after listening to her patiently, (I hoped she would stop on her own but she didn't), I had to say...Just stop! will you please! And her response? Well, I'm just saying. Yeah...she had been "just saying"...the whole time we were there and I'd had enough. The level of negativity was exhausting!
She didn't like it too much and said...well then I'll just shut up then.
Passive-aggressive much? yeah!
anyway....
hey...I can appreciate you wanted to go in the water, I can appreciate you wanted to lay in the sand...I can see why you're disappointed...but...all this complaining is stopping you from being able to appreciate the day for what it is! We have never seen waves this high here before and we're getting some awesome pictures that we wouldn't have been able to get otherwise. We're spending time together at the beach!
Yeah I know but....no buts!! stop focusing on what you didn't get and start appreciating what you did get. Otherwise we might as well go home.
I'm sharing this parenting moment with you for a reason...just like my daughter was disappointed she didn't get what she wanted, what she had hoped for...it still didn't mean that there wasn't good in our day. And that by complaining about what she thought she was missing...she was also making herself miss out on all the good that was our day together. Just like my daughter over the beach....we can do it over our pain and all the other things we experience in life.
Yeah...we won't always get what we want in life, and things won't always go the way we want, expect, or even hope that they will either....and then there are times when things happen to no fault of our own....BUT....and it's a big one....we can still find things in our days to appreciate, to love, and to even enjoy.
If you're spending your days complaining...you're missing out!!
You have to accept that in life? things happen! beyond our control things happen! things we'd rather not have happen...but they do. And we need to be flexible too. Acceptance of what is...is a hard thing for some...but if you can't? life always seems to be that much harder and to "suck" even more.
To complain once and to get on with your day? totally acceptable! we all need to bitch sometimes...but to spend your day being constantly negative? like I said to my kid...I ain't got time for that...no I don't. I'd much rather be finding the things in my days to smile over than to complain about. It makes my life easier to live (and it's the part of life we can control).
If you're told you complain too much...do you? And if you're wondering where everyone went? ask yourself this...did they get tired of hearing the broken record of complaints and negativity that always seems to be playing? (hard question I know...but...sometimes our own level of negativity gets to be too much and people just can't handle it anymore)
Now Em's flippant response is...what? is happy the only emotion I'm allowed to display or to have? No it's not! and it's silly to think so....but...regardless of the emotion...you are still responsible for how you express it, how you allow it to control you and your behaviour too...YOU HAVE A CHOICE!
Will you try to find the positives in your day regardless of any negative that may happen or will you swim in the pool of negativity till somebody kicks you out?
It's your choice...but I cant' do it
just my opinion...
Tammy