Do you live with anxiety? If so...what is your breathing like? Have you ever caught yourself holding your breath? What about hyperventilating? Do you ever feel lightheaded? Dizzy? Confused? You're not alone. It's not always easy to remember to breathe when the feelings of anxiety come. 

Yesterday, while at the hospital, I came across some information that I'd like to share with you here today. This information comes from the Centre for Clinical Interventions and is retyped exactly as they've prepared (without pictures). If you have any questions about what you read here, please speak to your doctor and/or treatment team. 

Anxiety and all the feelings that come with it, are very uncomfortable and sometimes we forget to breathe or we tend overbreathe. I hope that by practicing this exercise, you can change that for yourself moving forward. 

When I first read this piece I had mixed feelings about it. Yes! I am trying, and I know you are too. We're pushing ourselves through things that would make others crumble. We push ourselves through things that many don't understand or can even see. We push ourselves. Hard. Sometimes our expectations are unrealistic.

But you know what? Sometimes pushing ourselves is just another way for us to ignore ourselves and our needs.

You know it's true. When you push yourself through the pain instead of resting. When you push yourself through the fog trying to feel "normal". When you push yourself through the judgement instead of acknowledging how you truly feel. When you push yourself...are you ignoring yourself? your needs? 

Some think that the only way to get through life is to push yourself. I disagree. Sometimes what we need the most is to rest, to do the things that make us feel good, the things that make us smile, that lets us laugh and enjoy our lives...that's how we can through this thing called life. 

We need to encourage, nurture, love, accept, support, care for and forgive ourselves. We need to do what we can as we're able and we need to stop too when our bodies and minds need a break. We're only human. 

Don't push yourself beyond your breaking point. Just do the best you can each and every day and know that it's enough. 

take good care of you please and your needs too
​Tammy 

In an effort to find ways to help people learn about and even how to manage their pain, change their behaviours and just generally take control of their lives again...I'm always on the look out for things that might help, and I think this therapy is something to share with you. 

When you give thought to your patterns of thought...would you say they're negative? 
Have you ever thought of suicide? 
Have you ever hurt yourself because you're feeling so overwhelmed by life and/or your pain? 
Do you ever struggle to cope with your emotions? 
Are your behaviours unhealthy for you and your life? 
Would you like something different in your life moving forward? 

If you said yes to any of the above questions, I hope you'll give this a read and then go talk to your doctor and/or treatment team and ask them about DBT. Might this help you? Are you willing to put the work into changing your life moving forward? 

Now please keep in mind that this entry is not meant to take the place of direct and qualified medial care. It is being shared for your entertainment and personal information only. If you have any questions about what you read here...please go talk to your doctor. 

It's easy to say..."just let it go"...but the problem often is...how do we that? I came across this and thought it something to share to start you thinking.

Now that the new year is here...are you wondering how to let things from the past year(s) go? if you're saying yes...I hope this helps. 

Acceptance of what is is a big step and it's okay to be sad for a little while too. It's okay to cry for what you lost and it's okay to hide from the world for a bit too...but don't linger there.

Review what lessons you've learned, and focus on you. What are your life blessings? What do you want in your life moving forward? What don't you want in your life moving forward? Who can you turn to to help you? What can you do for you? 

"But what about those of us who have reached out, who are on the medications, following the doctor's advice... and it's still not helping? The physical pain grows worse daily, the mental and emotional pain follows suit. There are no stones left to turn..."

The above comment was left for me in response to the entry "The Hidden Dangers of Chronic Pain". (published 1/28/2016) When I read the comment it made me remember...​I remember feeling this way myself..I remembered hurting myself because of it and sadly...I'm sure that we're not the only ones to have been here...so for that reason, I'd like to take the time to respond here and hopefully turn over some stones.

Please keep in mind I am not passing judgement and my questions and comments are meant only to see if we can flip some stones. I don't have all the answers either okay? I do not know your life, nor your pain, nor your personal journey, but I do know mine, and sometimes? we're more alike than we are unalike. 

The thing with medications is? they're not a "cure all" to our pain (even though we may want and need them to be) and although they may help to decrease the level of pain you feel...they probably won't take it away completely, and even though you may be taking the medications as directed, you may still find your pain is higher than you'd like or are able to cope and manage with. You may even need to try many many different kinds of medication(s) before you find the one(s) that work best for you. You may also find that your medications may work for a while and then stops, or you may find that the side effects with the medications make taking them unbearable. There's a lot of "maybe's" when it comes to treating our pain. (which only adds to the frustration right? right!)

I wish I had seen this piece in the earlier days of my pain...maybe then I would have managed it better...maybe.

Truth is...living with chronic pain isn't just about living with the pain. It was a painful lesson that took me many years to learn, and honestly? I'm still learning it...learning to live it...learning.

Living a hurting life really isn't about our pain though...it's about the fear, depression and the panic we feel and how we cope with it. It's about our relationships and how our pain can impact them. It's about the feelings of guilt we feel and all the reasons we feel it and it's about grieving for the life we lost or can no longer live the way we want anymore. It's about the struggles we face daily and even our own negative thoughts OH...and the negativity of others (can't forget that because yes! we live with that too).

But one thing our hurting life is also? it's ours to live to the best of our abilities.

(meme found at Trigeminal Neuralgia on Facebook)

I'd like to take some time to ask you some questions. I do realize that these are some pretty personal and even intrusive questions, but I hope you'll give them a look and take some time to answer them.

Now that you're living life with a chronic illness whether it's mental or physical...what do you do when...

• When your pain is trying to take control?
• When you have to stop doing a chore because of your pain?
• When you have to cancel plans or when you have to leave early?
• When you can't do what you want to do when you want to do it?
• When thoughts of socializing make you want to hide?
• When others don't understand?
• When you hear things like...just snap out of it...you don't look like you're hurting...or any of the other things you've heard?
• When your doctor doesn't believe you? or says there is nothing more they can do to help you? or says they can't prescribe you certain medications anymore?
• When you struggle to go to work each day?
• When you are unable to work anymore?

​

I've been feeling very "human" lately...needing a hug... needing to hide...needing to catch my breath...I've been really human lately.

And you know what? It's okay to have these needs, to have these thoughts, to feel like everything is just too much, to need to catch your breath...it's okay. Do you know what else is okay? 

It's okay if you can't keep it all together. It's okay if you struggle some days. It's okay to hide. It's okay to cry. It's okay! We are only human.

When these days come...what do you do for you? how do you handle them? Do you love and support yourself through these days or do you beat yourself up for feeling this way? What do you do? 

thank you S.C. Lourie and Butterflies and Pebbles

When the summer started I gave a challenge here...a basic challenge to not let your pain stop you from making plans and enjoying the summer the way you wanted to.

Well...curious and nosy me now wants to know...did you do it? 
​

• Did you make plans this summer with your family, with your friends, with those that are special in your life...did you spend time with them? what did you do? 
• What did you do to help you prepare for your plans? 
• What did you bring along with you to help you cope with your pain while you were out and about? 
• What did you do for yourself and your needs when you came home and you were hurting for all you've done?
• What words did you use when talking with yourself when feeling your pain? What about those words when your anxiety, depression or even the PTSD said hello? How did you handle that? 

I'm always on the look out for inspirational quotes that make me think and the other day I came across one that just kinda hit me...

"Don't run from your pain - run into your pain" (Bryant McGill) 

Hmm...don't run from your pain...run into your pain? I tell ya...those nine words had my mind thinking. What did you think when you read it? What thoughts went through your mind? Are you running from your pain or are you running into it? hmm....

We know how we can run from our pain...but how do we run into it? And do we even want to? OH YEAH! we do!