We know pain is not only physical, but emotional and mental too and sometimes we don't always respond in the best way...our behaviour can be negatively affected by our pain. Give thought to how you behave when you are feeling your pain.
Take a look at the following...(just a few examples)
- drug and/or alcohol abuse
- prescription abuse
- self abuse
- disassociating with your life
- explosive verbal and/or physical outbursts
- negative self-talk
- eating disorders
- neglectful self-care
The second part of the challenge is to understand why you use those behaviours to manage your pain.
Take a look at the following...
- I abuse substances and/or medications because it allows me to escape reality, to feel numb
- I withdraw from life because I am embarrassed of my life and limitations, I don't have a job
- I talk bad about myself to me and others because I am ashamed of myself. I don't feel I am worthy.
- I am explosive when I feel threatened.
- I hurt myself when I am depressed or needing to escape my body pain
- I don't care to eat because I don't care about my life.
- Why bother showering or getting dressed? It's not like I have a job to go, or somewhere to go.
Your reasons may be different than those listed above...and that's okay. But please give thought to why you do what you do. This step is very important. The more you can understand the why...the more likely you are able to change the behaviour moving forward. Please take the time to do this.
Now the third part of the challenge is to list how you can handle those situations in your life differently moving forward in your life.
Take a look at the following...
- Change my thoughts....escaping reality doesn't change my reality...getting actively involved in it does...there is more to who I am than what I do for work...my pain is just one aspect of my life and in the grand scheme of things my life has been pretty awesome
- Showering and getting dressed isn't just so that I can go places...when I'm freshly showered and dressed I feel better...a shower is relaxing...a hot bath soothes my pain
- Learn how to soothe my aches without hurting myself...relaxation techniques, soothing my senses, calming self talk, practice positive scripts
- Talk to a counsellor about my thoughts and feelings...my doctor can help me set that up or I can call the urgent crisis phone lines that are confidential
- Learn to accept all that I am...even my pain too...to live my life for me and not for my limitations and my pain...I may be different in some ways but in many others way I'm still the same me
Sometimes...we don't always handle our pain well...So! there is one other thing I would also like to ask you to do...that you take the time to forgive yourself while you are working on this exercise. You are only human and being such means you will make mistakes, and you will not always behave in the best fashion...so when that happens? you need to be human enough too to forgive yourself. Your mistakes are not opportunities to beat yourself up or to take it out on those in your life. They are just mistakes and you will make many more as you go through life...do learn how to forgive yourself too okay? please?