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Personal Support System

3/2/2014

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Many times we dismiss the importance of having someone to talk with. Someone that we can unload to or call when we are distressed. When we try to keep it all to ourselves, instead of reaching out for help, we are only limiting ourselves.

Sometimes we think "no one will understand", or "that people must be sick and tired of listening to me always complaining of my aches and pains". Truth is they're not. Sometimes the people in our lives just don't know how to respond. They don't experience what we do. They have no idea of our limitations. Often the people we “complain” to feel just as helpless as we do.

Often people say they don't want to be a bother to their friends. Some people give help rather than to ask for it. I'd like to think, that as a friend, if someone you knew was hurting, you would go out of your way to help them feel better. That's what friends are for right? So why don't we deserve the same thing? Hint: We DO! So when your friends come calling and they're trying to help bring you up, let them! One of the best things about having great friends is that they can make us smile even when we don't want to.
At times, our problem is that we don't know how to ask for help, or know where to go to get it. Maybe you are new to the area and don't know many people to connect with. We all have our barriers to social interactions. With help we can over come them too. 

Have you ever caught yourself telling an almost complete stranger your story? Have you ever listened to someone else tell theirs? We as humans have an innate need to communicate and without it we tend to withdraw from those around us. We are social animals and need this to survive. It is a basic function of who we are.

But what if you are hurting. Do you know the people you can count on to help? Who do you call when the pain becomes unbearable? What if you are unable to pick the kids up because you are hurting too much? Who do you call? These people are your support system. Your personal network of help.

How each person can help depends on you. What do you need from this person? Are you willing to open up and are you willing to ASK for the help that is available? Sometimes talking with one person may open a connection to someone else. This is commonly referred to as networking.

Even when looking for employment one would recommend that you build a networking system of employment contacts. Well, even in recovery, a networking system is needed. A system of people you can reach out to when you are in need. These people are your personal support system.

Each person's support system is different. Please take the time to think about yours. Answer the question “Who do I call when....” and fill in the blanks. You will be surprised how quickly your list fills up. Consider everyone you come in contact with on a daily, or even a weekly basis. There is often more support than we realize. 

take good care of you okay? 


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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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