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Chronic Pain & Life

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The Yeah But

9/24/2014

1 Comment

 
Have you ever met someone who asks for help, seems to want help but when you offer the help, you are met with the response..."yeah, but...."? Have you ever responded in this manner yourself? I know I have. I can admit it...I've been a yeah but.

There are several variations of the "yeah but"...
  • yeah that may have worked for you but....
  • yeah I tried that too but....
  • yeah? but what if....
  • yeah I was going to try that but....

Do any of the above sound familiar to you? What is your typical response when someone offers you advice or gives a suggestion? Only you know if you're a "yeah but" too. Are you willing to admit it? Are you able to admit it...even to yourself? If you can admit it..think to when have you said "yeah but"? Why do you say it? Do you hope the conversation and advice will end if you say you've tried it but it doesn't work? 
I think the "yeah but" response comes in handy when change is involved. When we're faced with having to make some tough choices and we're a little scared of breaking out of the comfort zone we're so snuggled deep in. The "yeah but" response keeps us static and safe but it also prevents us from taking risks and making the changes we want for us moving forward. The "yeah but" response seems to play well with the "what if" game too...ever notice that?..."Yeah that may work but what if...?" 

When saying the phrase "yeah but" it will often end the conversation and can leave people feeling exhausted and frustrated. Our friends, loved ones and even our doctors feel helpless because they want to help and we're rejecting all their efforts and we feel exhausted because we're often reminded of all the things we have tried that didn't work, and frustrated for having to defend our efforts.

Give some thought to when you've said "yeah but". Why did you respond with those words? What are you afraid of? Let go of the "yeah but" and give things a try...take risks and chances too...and change your "yeah but" into "I can do that"..."sounds like a great idea"..."why not give it a try?" 

take good care of you
1 Comment
Ashlee M link
12/6/2020 12:28:40 am

Greatt read thanks

Reply



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    Tammy...

    is living life with chronic pain...doing the best I can with everyday. 

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